2013

2012 was a year of change and accomplishment. So much happened in my life that really made me grow stronger in my faith and see myself as someone with value and worth. I have spent so many years struggling to move beyond my past and embrace the amazing future I know lies ahead of me. Last year I graduated from college, moved out of Wisconsin, and entered a community that really made me re-evaluate a lot in my life. I am really working hard on getting healthy, doing everything I can to remain connected within the community that has so lovingly welcomed me in, and realizing that I want to do more to give back as I am continually blessed each and every day.

So what I want for 2013 is to continue my health journey and to find as many opportunities as possible to volunteer and make the world better somehow. If anyone has any suggestions for local or global volunteer work, please let me know!

Brave: possessing or exhibiting courage or courageous endurance.

Brave is:

Moving across the country for a job when you’ve never lived further than 45 minutes from your family.

Never giving up despite having Leukemia and fighting Pneumonia at the same time.

Going to therapy even though it can turn out to be the hardest hour of your week.

Having the courage to walk away from something even though you swore this wouldn’t happen to you.

Giving a significant amount of your time to head up a 6^th-12^th grade youth group.

Getting out of bed each morning.

Moving to a place you never thought you’d go back to because family comes first.

Saying goodbye to your child as he heads off to the marines.

Choosing to follow God every day of your life.

Going to Law School so you can learn how to protect innocent people from being trafficked and exploited.

Following your passion even though you may not know where you’ll end up in the next five years.

Learning how to set boundaries.

Taking steps to change your life.

Opening your home and hearts by adopting kids without homes of their own.

Serving your country to protect the freedom we so often take for granted.

Today I’ve been thinking about what it means to be brave. I have so many brave people that surround me on a daily basis. I’m sure there are a million more things that I could add to this list, but you get the idea. I’m proud of the people in my life. They make me realize how good life is even though it can really kick our butts sometime.

Brave: possessing or exhibiting courage or courageous endurance.

Joy and Happiness

Today was a successful day. Woke up and went on a 5 mile bike ride, got my hair touched up, ran errands, made steak, mashed potatoes, and asparagus for dinner, had Tammy’s amazing help keeping me focused and on track whilst cleaning/organizing/packing my office, continued with another episode of Greek, and just took a relaxing bath. Quite the day and this girl is pooped!

Feeling really good about life right now. It is nice when it seems like everything is going right. It is nice to feel joy and happiness and not let the hard things drag me down. Life is good. And that makes me thankful for all I’ve been blessed with. J

Step by Step

This last week marked my first with an accountability partner and it was pretty great. I’m not going to say I made perfect decisions all week long, but I made good decisions a lot of the time. I think the key to this whole journey is continually telling myself that this is a slow process. Nothing will happen overnight. It is going to take a while to kick some of the bad habits and attach to the good habits, but the changes will definitely stick.
            I’m glad Aby is working with me in this. She has proven in the short time we’ve done this to be really helpful, motivational, and encouraging.
            One of the things I have learned this week is that I need to learn to manage time better. So one of my projects for this week is to start planning the times I am going to work out, when I’m going to have meals (if I can help it), and if I say I’m going to do something, I want to put it into a calendar. I did not reach a few of my goals this week, but most of that had to do with time management and lack of energy in some cases. So that was a good thing to learn as the week went on.
            I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. I have to keep telling myself that. The more I say it, the more I believe it. J. Step by step I am going to feel healthier, stronger, and much more energetic!

Accountability

This week has been the start of a new (ish) adventure. I have officially asked my older sister (Abigail) to be my accountability partner as far as my journey with health goes. Basically what we have agreed on is that I will send her a list of my weekly goals each Sunday and she will call/email/text me to ask me how I’m doing with them. I am really excited because Abigail is the greatest at being supportive and encouraging, but she is also good at challenging and holding people to things. I need someone to check in with. I need someone to ask me how my journey is going and I know she is the best candidate for that.

This week my goals were as follows: Exercise at least 3 times; drink at least 8 cups of water a day; wake up early (meaning 8:00ish) and take my dogs on a walk around the loop in my subdivision, blog at least twice, and make healthier choices when I eat out.

So far I am satisfied with the way my week has gone. I have significantly decreased the amount of diet soda I’ve been drinking and have been drinking over 8 cups each day. I am proud to say I have resisted the urge to go to the Kiltie (the local drive in ice cream joint) to get an amazing dessert. The thing I’m noticing though, is that while I am proud I am making the right choices, I sometimes find that I am making the choices grudgingly. When the moment has passed, I feel glad that I pushed through the temptation, but while I’m making it I am not happy about it. I want to change that mindset.

I need to tell myself every single day that the little choices are going to make a big difference in the rest of my life. I know I want this. I know I want to be healthier. I want to go shopping with my sisters and actually enjoy myself. I want to meet guys and not have them judge me based on appearance alone. I know that I am fighting for a longer, healthier, happier life. And now I have a great mentor, spiritual confidant, and accountability partner in my sister Abigail. I know I am going to make mistakes, but it’s nice to know that I can talk to her and not feel judged. I know that she will talk me through why I made the mistake I did and what I can do to prevent it in the future. I am ready for change, but haven’t felt like I could do it alone. Now I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that this time next year I’ll be rocking it in the family soccer game and getting up on waterskis again. I’ll look forward to skiing vacations in Colorado and eventually tackle my dreams of getting really awesome at biking and tennis.

So here it goes. My life is changing and I’m embracing every minute of it!!

Life's a Happy Song!

I am always surprised when I learn something deep from a movie intended for kids. I am a big fan of The Muppets and have recently watched the movie and have been listening to the soundtrack. One of the songs is called “Life’s a Happy Song”. While I don’t fully agree with life being completely perfect, a few of the lines jumped out at me:

“I’ve Got Everything that I need, right in front of me.

Nothing’s stopping me, nothing that I can’t be with you right here next to me.”

One of the things that I have been worrying about recently is my future. I graduate in less than a month and the number one question I am being asked is, “What are you going to do when you graduate?” and to be quite honest….I have no idea. I feel myself becoming less content with where I am at and what I am supposed to be doing the more people ask me that question. Instead of focusing on the fact that I’m about to accomplish something I thought would never come, I am freaking out that I don’t know what my next step is going to be. I am immersed in confusion and tumultuous feelings.

As I listened to that song and after spending a wonderful evening with one of my favorite families in the world, I began to realize something: I have everything that I need (food, water, friends, family, support, love, people who care about me) and knowing that made the stress of the rest of my life release its grip on me.

God makes a promise in Jeremiah 29:11 that He has a plan for me. He is going to prosper me, not harm me. He wants to give me a hope and a future. What an incredible promise. While my future is still unclear, I know that He will provide. And I want nothing more than to fully rely on Him.

I just need to continually remind myself that when I try to take control of things, it rarely works out. My God is greater and stronger and more reliable than I am. He guides me every step and I want to follow Him wherever he tells me to go. My heart is open and ready for wherever he takes me. And I’m not going to stress out about it.
So if you ask me what I’m going to do after I graduate, I’m going to tell you to ask God. J.

High respect

Hi. My name is Claire and I am terrible at keeping things clean. I go through spurts where everything has a place and nothing is out of order, but this semester things have been out of control.

I don’t make cleaning a priority and that’s not fair to my amazing roommate, Tammy. Tammy has always been patient with me, but I was thinking about her today and realized that I want to be the kind of person who honors her friends. When I looked up the word honor this particular definition jumped out at me - high respect. Then I looked up respect to see what I would find and I came across the definition – to show regard or consideration to….

I realized that when Tammy wakes up and sees that the house is a disaster, she certainly doesn’t feel like I am considering her and the way she might like to see. I realized that I have been selfish and underserving of her understanding of my odd lifestyle (traveling, school, etc.)

So Tammy I want to honor you. I want you to know that I do care and consider your feelings. So from now on, I am going to do my absolute best to make you feel at peace in your home. I can’t promise perfection, but I can promise that I will do my very best to keep things orderly. Jesus told us to treat others as we would want to be treated. I certainly want my friends to show regard/consideration to me.

Love you, Tammy:

Claire